Transcript of the Crush Limprod show, March 21, 2011.
"Ladies and Gentlemen, I have in front of me a report about a very sinister event involving Barack Hussein Ayatollah Abu-Jamal Obama. Last week he was giving a speech at a community college in Maryland when he was approached by a young street thug who proceeded to flash gang signs. The president quickly flashed back some sort of gangolese message in response. Now, folks, we have experts working around the clock to decode these gang signs. These experts are going through the video, frame by frame, to determine exactly what it was the two were discussing. There is some dispute as to which gang sign language was being used - American Gang Language, Detroit Gang Sign or Chicago Thug. Depending which was used, the message could have been, "Drive-by at 4:00 sharp, bring your gun", "I got that crack you ordered" or "Kill whitey". Now, folks, this is a matter of national security. Our president is obviously associating with criminal gang members and is either planning to kill white people, take part in a drive-by shooting, or purchase crack cocaine. Or perhaps he is planning to do all three at once - kill white people in a drive-by shooting while high on crack. Of course the liberal media is literally swooning over the incident; they are even spinning it as "sign language". Folks, I know all about sign language and deaf people, having caused my own deafness by taking massive amounts of uh, Flintstones Vitamins, and that could not have been it. You see, black people do not speak sign language because there is no ebonics counterpart to it. Whatever it was that Mullah Obama was signaling to this dangerous young street thug, you can bet it wasn't innocent, folks. "